I love food. I mean, I really, really love food. I love cooking, I love chopping things, peeling things, and most of all, I love eating things.
Now this causes a problem. I’m also 24 and very susceptible to laziness. It totally sucks. Since I’ve been with Josh for the past month or so, he’s been getting me out. I’m becoming more and more active. But I’m also not working. So I sit at home a lot of the time, and while I try to keep myself busy, I often find myself eating more than I need to. It never fills me up, I could eat a triple lunch.
Sigh. Josh says I cook healthy really well. Some highlights were my stuffed Zucchinis with parmesan and jalapeños. I can also make one hell of a salad dressing, and I am getting good at using spices and getting good flavour with little calories.
But what I really want to eat, is gooey, cheesy, starchy casseroles, slabs of red meat, potatoes and chocolate. LOTS of chocolate.
The exercise has been wonderful. We hiked Humpback Rocks this weekend on our way to the Green Valley Book Fair.
I was a bit nervous to do this hike. Josh had done it before and he said it was pretty steep, but worth it at the top. We headed out with few people to crowd us in. Humpback Rocks is one of Central Virginia’s most popualr hikes, so we hoped doing it in March before the masses arrived would give us a wide open trail for me to drag my sorry ass up in peace.
We made a few stops for breaks and photos. I am absolutely fascinated by the forests here. I grew up completely in the Boreal Forest, which Josh pointed out. The type of forests in Virginia are foreign to me. They’re beautiful, and ancient, with twisting branches and rough bark. Some have fungus, others have holes drilled into them from insects and woodpeckers. I could have stood forever in the stillness, watching the squirrels forage and the birds flap their wings.
The trail got muddy, and at one point I ended up with a completely soaked foot, but I carried on. I slipped once, tried to scramble up a rock and gave up. I held Josh’s hand as we picked our way up.
We made it almost to the top, and then the damn trail turned into an icefall. We both had hikers on, but you would have needed a pair of crampons to get all the way up. I stared at the top, just 1,000 feet from where I stood, and I couldn’t get there. After huffing and puffing all the way up a steep trail, I was really disappointed. I did it! I’d done all the hard work, but now I was stymied. We took some sad photos, and turned back, warning others on the trail.
Later, we walked downtown for some St. Patrick’s Day revelry and I opted for the steep way to get to our first destination.
All this exercise is still complicated with self doubt. I’m happy to be out, but at the same time I can’t get rid of the craving for all the things that are bad for me.
Last night, I was finishing up the dishes in our tiny kitchen. I was setting down the last wine glass, when I knocked a small bowl loose from the pile. I scrambled to grab it but it slipped through my fingers and landed on the floor, shattering just inches from my bare feet. Josh ran to my rescue, but he too was in bare feet. He went and got a pair of shoes while I carefully slipped myself onto the counter beside the sink, letting my feet dangle against the cabinets. Josh cleaned up around me, and we laughed. He thought it was funny that I was trapped in the kitchen till he came to my aid. Rather than give me a pair of shoes, he grabbed my phone and started taking pictures of me, helpless on the counter.
I added the photos to Facebook, fretting about how I looked. But then I made a realization: my legs have shrunk since I got here. They look good, I mean as good as they have since high school. I’ve hiked, walked, speed walked, and I already see a difference over a month in a half. I also think the rest of me is looking better too, although the difference is less profound.
So maybe my obsession with cheese is not so bad? I mean I know for sure I need to cut down, I need to get out and do more. Right now, I should be walking down to the Red Box to return my movies. I put all exercise off. I think, I’ll start tomorrow. Tomorrow I’ll walk. I should be doing it today.
When I let Josh in, let him take me hiking, not only do I always have a fabulous time, I feel 100 times better afterward. So why am I putting off that feeling of success, happiness and peace?
Because doing nothing at all is easier and more comfortable. But hey, my movies haven’t returned themselves since I started writing this, and this blog is done.
I think I’ve run out of dumb excuses.